standinfor.me

Email templates · Place of worship

Email template to ask a church about holding your wedding there

You want to be married in a particular church, synagogue, mosque, or temple, and you do not know whether they will do it, what they ask of the couple, or what the fees are. Most congregations have rules that are not on the website: some marry only members, some require a set of preparation meetings months ahead, some limit outside officiants (the person who performs the ceremony) or outside musicians.

Write instead of calling because the office is usually staffed part-time by a volunteer or an administrator, and the clergy who decide are rarely the person who answers the phone. An email gets forwarded to the right person and comes back with the actual requirements, dates and fees in writing, which you will want when you plan around them.

Before you send

  • Two or three possible dates and times, including a first choice. Many congregations do not hold weddings during certain seasons or on certain days of the week.
  • Whether either of you is a member, was raised in this faith, or attends elsewhere. Say it plainly; it changes what they will ask for.
  • A rough guest count. The sanctuary and the parking lot both have limits.
  • Whether you hope to use the congregation's own clergy and musicians or bring your own.
  • Whether you would also like to use their hall for the reception, since that is often booked and priced separately.
Subject Wedding at [congregation name] on [preferred date] 
Hi [office or clergy name],

My partner [partner's name] and I are hoping to be married at [congregation name], and I'd like to find out whether that's possible and what you require.

Our first choice is [preferred date and time], with [second date] as a backup. We expect about [number] guests. [One sentence on your connection, for example "I was confirmed here and my parents are still members" or "Neither of us is a member, but we live nearby and have attended several times."]

Could you let me know:

- Whether the sanctuary is available on either date
- What preparation or meetings you ask of couples, and how far ahead they need to start
- Whether we may bring our own officiant or musicians, or use yours
- The fees for the ceremony, the space, and any staff
- Whether the hall is available afterward for a reception, and its cost

We'd like to settle the location by [decision date], so anything you can share by then would help a lot.

Thank you,
[Your name]
[Your phone number]

Everything in brackets is yours to fill in. Keep the rest as it is or change the tone to match how you write.

After you send

  • A typical reply comes from the office within a week with a requirements sheet and a fee list, or an invitation to meet with the clergy first. If it is the meeting, take it; that conversation is where the real answers are.
  • If the answer is that they marry only members, ask what membership involves and how long it takes. Sometimes the timeline works; sometimes it doesn't, and it is better to know now.
  • Fees at a place of worship are usually modest but often come as several separate items: the building, the clergy, the organist, the custodian. Add them up and ask whether a donation is expected on top.
  • If two weeks pass with no answer, send one short follow-up and, in parallel, email your second-choice congregation.

Or don't send it yourself

Forward the job to myagent@standinfor.me and let StandIn run the whole thread.

StandIn is an email assistant that handles conversations with businesses for you. You write it one email saying what you need. It writes to the business, waits for the answer, follows up when they go quiet, pushes back on the number when it should, and brings the results back to your inbox for you to decide. You don't need to install an app or sign up. The first email you send is already the start of the task.

Hand this to StandIn opens an email to myagent@standinfor.me with the job already written out

To myagent@standinfor.me Subject Find out if we can get married at a church 
Hi StandIn,

Please find out whether we can hold our wedding at a place of worship, what they require of us, and what it will cost.

The congregation: [name and location].
Our dates: [first choice and backup, with times].
Our connection: [member, raised in the faith, attend elsewhere, or none].
Guest count: [approximate number].
Officiant and music: [use theirs, bring our own, or either].
Reception: [want to use their hall or not].

If they can't host us or the dates don't work, ask [second-choice congregation, or "two similar congregations nearby"] the same questions, and bring me the requirements, dates and fees for each.

Thanks,
[Your name]

Related templates